that retard life!

2010-04-14T11:26:00.000-07:00

i just noticed that, there is no boy who could change what i feel for him. and its HIM not him... i dont like him anymore i like HIM still :(

2010-04-08T06:55:00.002-07:00

i have been lying to myself all the time i guess.
i was just wondering right now what's so wrong about me?
because..
i have been loving someone for 5 months and now i just noticed that all the time, it was just bullshit in my head!
nothing about it was true.
he had nothing good about him.
he wasnt the best ever.
he wasnt nice to me and i know that.
he wasnt even smart and IT COUNTS ok.
no dude, i mean like....
i think i have an 'obsession problem'
you know like haha shit i think im making that up but no its actually true.

when i cant have someone, i do anything to have them;

and if i still cant have them,

i cry i nearly die and i tell everyone im depressed.

yeah well thats really stupid but it's true though.

but when i can have someone;

i just DONT GIVE A SHIT about them.

and it's mean.

stupid.

immature.

grrrrr.

but it's TRUE and i know it..

because when i could have chris i was just not caring much at all about him but when he just left me i got so depressed; well i mean.. i missed him.

i cried everyday LITTTTTERRALLY EVERY FUCKING DAY.

and then once i got him back;

but i broke up with him HAHAHA ;L;

because im stupid. that's why..

cause then after breaking up with him he just;

didnt give a shit about me anymore,

he probs was disappointed about me ay.

and then what did i do?

i kept crying AGAIN.

i just turned emo *seriously dude it was weird.*

i DIED.

and then i went out with blake; (L);

and i actually liked blake.

i did.. i really did.

but i couldnt take it because it's just ..

i dont know.

when i was going out with blake i was having LOTS. of problems and seriously it was bad and i kept crying everyday but i couldnt tell him and then i kept getting sad and sad and he was like oh what happened and i didn't want to tell him i was like '' dw its all good '' and then i just told him i didnt want to go out with him.

but geez, he is perfect.

he is the only guy i can go out with and i know that.

i even wanted to marry him SERIOUSLY I DID. HAHA

but like, while i was LOVING blake I was LOVING chris and chris was the one who didnt give a shit about me so me the stupid bitch here just broke up with blake because he was too easy for me.

and then yerr... but now its just ALL THE OBSESSION THINGY coming again.. like,

blake he is just not being my friend.

when i talk to him he ignores me its just really annoying because i WANT ATTENTION and he doesnt give a fuck.

and while he doesnt give a fuck it makes me like him more.

and more.

but i dont want it to get bigger as it was with chris,

but he does the same stuff as chris used to do!

its making me scared though because i know he is good really good arrrrrrgh shit

RESUMING EVERYTHING I JUST SAID;

i want what i cant have, when i have it i just give it away, but then i cant have it again, and i cry and cry and i still cant have it'; then i die and the story ends thank you i need to grow up.

2010-04-08T06:55:00.001-07:00

loser group is the shit AY

2010-04-08T06:54:00.001-07:00

you love her;
but you just like me.
GRRRRRRRRRR GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

2010-04-08T06:53:00.000-07:00

YOU'RE NOT HOT! you're cute :)
you don't lie! you just show me the reality.

2010-04-08T06:49:00.000-07:00

fuck it fuck it fuck it fuck it ahahahahahahahaa no...im feeling mean now shit, gosh i just did some shit AGAIN omg i always hurt people's feelings :( i just did a big mistake
GEEEEEZ i always make mistakes its not normal

2010-04-04T04:48:00.002-07:00

2010-04-04T04:48:00.001-07:00

2010-04-04T04:47:00.000-07:00

you know a lot of boys think i like them but
you're the only one
you will be up on anything
because you're the best one right
you're the fucking best and it always will be the same.
always the one i will like better on anything
you can have my heart
you can have everything
because i know you worth it
everything im doing, everything im going through..
you worth it.
you will be up on anything babe.
you make me feel happy even when i am sad
you make my heart go crazy
you make my life go happy
and you make me smile
you know some guys think i like them but
you're the only one.
you will be up on anything.
you make me feel better
you make me feel the best
you make my heart go crazy
and you make me go crazy as well.
i will be always there
always when you need me i will be there for you
you're perfect.
i cant see anything wrong with you.
well maybe you dont feel the same about me but
i dont care
you will always be up on anything
i love you,
i love your hair,
i love your eyes,
i love your smile!
i love the way you talk
i love the way you joke
i love everything
but i dont love the way you treat me..
but its ok because it doesnt matter ok
it will not change anything.
i had to notice by myself how much i needed you.
you will be up on anything!
you will always be the best
you will always be the one
you will always be the one i ever wanted.
it doesnt change.
it will never change.
my love for you is forever and forever doesnt end.
im sorry if i sound weird but
baby you will be always up on anything!
because you're the best!
my friends told me i had an obssesion,
i told them i was in love.
when i met you my heart told me what love meant.
love means everything for you,
it means that it's good but it can be bad,
it can be really sad,
it's really sad for me right now but i'm smilling,
because i know you're the best,
now i found out why the other guys are never the same as you,
the other guys always sound stupid,
the other guys always sound gay,
the other guys always sound dumb,
the other guys never sound like you.
the way you are, the way you were
and the way you will be are always the best.
im sorry if im crazy for you but
why would i not be if you are so perfect?
why would i not love you?
because you dont love me?
but i know one day you will!
im the best for you,
its from another life,
thats why its so big,
thats why it will never end!
its like up on anything,
i would give up my life for you.
i would do anything for you.
because you are the best.
the best i ever had.
and the best i will have again.
because i can!
because i want!
and because i will!
i can spend whatever on it
i can do anything for it!
it will always worth it.
you worth anything.
you make me love,
you make me happy,
you can make me sad but
it will worth it in the end
because i came here to love you
and you came here to love me
i know it,
i bet you i'm right.
my love is bigger than anything.
its sweeter than anything.
i love you baby.
because you can make me smile even when im crying
you can make me smile when im sad
you can be the best even if you're not
you are the only one
the only one who will always be up on anything.
the only one that i can actually love.
because you showed me what love meant and now i know what love is
and i know love doesnt end.
real love doesnt end.
you're the half of heart i need
you're what i need
you're what i want!
you are the one i will always miss
you are the one i will always cry for
you are the one i will always love
it's true,
it hurts me but it's true!
i know its true.
i know we should be together.
i know we will grow up together!
i know i met you in another life and
i know i'm here to make you happy again.
yes i sound crazy,
yes i sound stupid,
yes i sound really gay but
it's true.
its bigger then anything,
you will be up on anything,
you will always be the best one.
i can tell you.
you are the best ever. and
you will always be...

TUESDAY 16/02/2010.

2010-04-04T04:43:00.002-07:00

today, i woke up thinking of you and wondering why i let you go
and you didnt come back to me,
i wish i was in ur arms, i wish i was with you, i wish you could
love me and i wonder why you dont,
i think bout dying i think of you when im crying, i cried for
you yesterday
im crying for you today i will cry for you tomorrow
i guess ur everything i need to have, i guess ur all i ever wanted,
i guess im gonna die loving you, coz i already live loving you
and it doesnt stop,
its not just a crush, its not just a guy, its not just a summer love,
its more than that, its everything to me,
i would kill for you, i would die for you, i would do anything anything ANYTHING for you,
i would do anything to have you, and im dying for you,
i gave you my heart, and you broke it
i told you my feelings and you laughed at it,
i gave you my life and u fucked it
i lost my friends coz of you
i changed the way i dress for you
i changed the way i am for you
i cant even go to the park with my dog anymore coz when i go there the only thing in my mind
is you, and everything you did, and how many times i cried!
you have no idea how many times i cried!
you have no idea how many times i said i was gonna die!
you have no idea how much i want to die!
you have no idea why i love you,
but i do, you're everything to me!
i just wish i was everything to you, i wish you even liked me,
now my best friend is my ipod,
my clothes are black,
my ''friends'' dont talk to me!
i dont sleep!
i dont talk!
i dont have friends!
i dont have a life!
CUZ I GAVE IT TO YOU, AND I FELL FOR YOU!
AND YOU, YOU DIDNT CARE! YOU IGNORED!
YOU TOLD ME TO FUCK OFF!
YOU TOLD ME I WAS ANNOYING!
YOU TOLD ME I WAS A STALKER!
YOU TOLD ME I WAS STUPID!
YOU TOLD ME I SHOULD DIE!
YOU TOLD ME I WAS IMMATURE!
YOU TOLD ME I WAS BULLSHIT!
YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVED SOMEONE ELSE!
YOU TOLD ME YOU WOULD NEVER LIKE ME!
YOU TOLD ME HOW BAD HOW STUPID HOW USELESS HOW ANNOYING HOW IMMATURE HOW UGLY AND EVERYTHING
YOU JUST WANT ME TO DIE!
YOU WANT THE PERSON WHO MOST LOVE YOU IN THE WHOLE WORLD TO DIE!
AND YOU DO, FOR NO REASON BUT YOU DO!
YOU CANT UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING I HAD TO DO FOR YOU
YOU CANT UNDERSTAND HOW SAD IM
AND I BLAME IT ON YOU!
I BLAME IT ON YOU, COZ YOU'RE PERFECT!
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR ALL I EVER WANTED!
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR CUTE
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR FUNNY
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR NICE
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ U FORGOT ME
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ ALWAYS WHEN I LISTEN TO BEST I EVER HAD I WANT TO DIE!
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ YOU MADE ME HAPPY AND YOU COULD MAKE ME THE HAPPIEST PERSON EVER!
I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ THE ONLY PERSON I COULD EVER FALL IN LOVE WITH IS YOU!!
YOU! YOU! AND YOU!
UR THE ONLY ONE!
UR THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN MAKE ME HAPPY!
BUT YOU DONT WANT TO!
YOU WANT TO MAKE ME REAL SAD!
I KNOW IT, I KNOW THAT IM NOT THE BEST FOR YOU,
I KNOW THAT YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN ME,
AND I KNOW THAT UR NEVER GONNA LOVE ME.
But the other thing i know is that i will always love you, and you're the
only guy i could ever die for, i could give my life for, i could kill for,
i could cry for, i could do anything for.
Just telling you, how much i need you.
I'm so sorry, im so so so sorry for meeting you and loving you,
umm i hope i get over it, but i know i cant, coz ur everything !
YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME! OK, EVERYTHING. I REALLY MEAN IT!
today i was at my mums friends house, and there was a guy who was smelling really good.. and yea im weird and
talk bout ppls smell lol and like he smelt like u do, it was weird, and in the same moment when that guy came
i was listening to best i ever had, just to fuck it more you know
then, i told my mum i wanted to go home coz i couldnt stay there
coz i couldnt do anything
and i did it coz i couldnt stop thinking of you when that guy was next to me
i dont know what to do anymore, i really dont
i pretty much think the only thing i can do to forget you is die.
and maybe, im gonna die, coz the way i told you i would always love you and i do,
i am telling you i would die for you and i will,
its like the only thing i can do right now! its the only thing that matters to me!
its you!
its you!
i love you
i love the way you talk and you know it
i love the way you act and you know it
i love the way you are and you know it
i love your hair and you know it
i love your smell and you know it lol
i loved when you used to texted me each 5 minutes and i used to text you the whole day
i loved when i met you
i loved when i told you i loved you
i loved you when we went to the park that day and i told you to yell penis if you loved me and you did lol
and then after all that, my best friend amy hated me, she hated me coz she knew you were everything to me,
and now im crying, and now im dying, and now im wondering why cant you love me :(
i seriously cant do anything anymore, i just cant, i go to my friends house and i talk about you.
i dont sleep anymore
i dont talk anymore
and when i talk its about you
when i cry its for you
when die its for you
when i think im thinking of you
when i go out with someone i just wish SO MUCH you were that person!
when i tell some guy i love him, i dont.
everyday when i wake up,
i say '' today im gonna stop loving him, today i hate him and today im not gonna try to talk to him! ''
when i say that, im lying to myself,
when i say something bad about you
im lying to myself
when i say i love you its the biggest truth ever,
when i say ur everything to me im not lying, you are.
you are everything i need
you are everything i love
you are everything i always wanted
but i cant have it,
i really changed like REALLY DID
im not funny as i used to be
i dont dress like i used to dress coz i know you dont like it
my hair looks like emo,
my mum said i have to eat, but i dont, and when i do i want to vomit
my friends said i have a problem, its not just a problem its an obssesion!
and its you,
why do i love you?
why are you everything?
why are you so cute?
and why are you so perfect?
and why cant you love me like other people do?
well, i know why i guess..
coz for you im stupid
coz for you im useless
coz for you im bullshit
coz for you im immature
coz for you im nothing
coz for you im not even a good friend
coz for you im ugly
and coz for you, im not enough.

im not even gonna send this to you, coz i know you wont read it, and i know you're never gonna know how much i love you and
like, im trying to stop crying, im trying to stop dying, im trying to eat, im trying to forget you,
im trying to make new friends, im trying to sleep, im trying to be the way i used to be, the problem is that i cant. :(
ok, i think its all i wanted to say.

2010-04-04T04:43:00.001-07:00

i dont know what to write anymore, like omgggg i keep writting about
him but i dont want to and i dont
mean to :(
like, its weird how much i love him, sometimes i get crazy,
sometimes i cry and it makes me sad it makes me feel bad you know..
its like, he doesnt care at all, he acts like i dont mean anything and
i actually dont mean anything to himmm :(
i think he hates me,
but he doesnt have reasons to!
he doesnt need to make me feel bad just because he is feeling bad.
i cant sleep i cant just live my life again!
i cant have my friends back
and i have no idea how i left my friends just because of a guy!
I CANT BELIEVE HOW MUCH HE MEANS TO ME
I HAVE NO IDEA WHY BUT I KNOW HE MEANS MORE THAN
ANYTHING
i know he is not mine but i know he needs to be!
its like that! he needs to be mine and he needs to love me!
thats why we were born, to love eachother........... ):
please YOU love me!
i beg you
i do anything you want
i already did anything to have you but u didnt want me!
whats wrong with me aye
i dont know.. i really dont know whats wrong with me,..
i just know that im annoying for you
im ugly for you
im not enough for you
im stupid for you
im useless for you
im everything as bad as it can be for you!
why cant you see me? why cant you just love me backkkkk, thats all i ever wanted, to see you smilling and
looking at me and saying '' i love you '' and i would know you
mean it!
but you cant, you wont, and you dont want to .
you dont love me for some reason
im not ugly, there is millions of people out there uglier than me!
im not annoying, there is lots of people who say im not!
im not perfect, i know im not, no one is perfect but please dont be
perfectionist
I LOVE YOU.
PLEASE LOVE ME
please please please!
boy please be mine!
just please give me a hug
just please give me your loveeeeeeeee,
thats all i want,
i want your love and i want it now
i wanna love you i wanna kiss you i wanna hug you i wanna touch you
anything for you
whenever
wherever
however........................
im feeling sad inside now,
its your fault and please talk to me
please dont ignore me,
last week i had a fight with my mum and i went running to the
bathroom and i really was gonna cut myself
so my mum just went inside and started yelling at me
it sucks that i know i didnt want to die because of my fights with
my mum
i wanted to die because.......... because........ i just.. i dont know
maybe god just said '' you need to love him, but he doesnt
love
you and you will die for it '' ????
well i dont think god would do that
maybe god said '' you will love him, he wont love you but one
day he will notice how important you are and he will
ask everyday himself why he didnt love you when you loved him ''
well.. i would like god to say that aye
but i dont think he did
i dont know ok im confused im sad im afraid and im afraid of love, i
notice that love can do anything, it changes ANYTHING
it makes u sad and makes u happy, it makes you shy it makes you
cry, it makes you smile and it stays for a while.
i wanna see you, just seeing you would make me
happpppppy. :(
i dont know what to do, gosh, please god help me! i dont wanna cry
i dont wanna feel sad anymore!
PLEASE MAKE HIM LIKE ME, GOD PLEEEEEEASE MAKE
HIM NOTICE THAT IM THE ONE FOR HIM!
MAKE HIM THINK ABOUT ME THE WHOLE NIGHT TODAY
AND MAKE HIM LOVE ME !
MAKE HIM CRAZY ABOUT ME
PLEEEEASE MAKE HIM LOVE ME
I NEED HIM TO BE MINE
OR I CAN EVEN DIE.
i wasnt eating sometime ago, now i cant stop eating.
my mum said im suicidle and i said no im not
and she said yes you are and you're
depressed and i was like wth?
and she said that im getting depressed and
she doesnt know why but she noticed it.
im scared, god, im really sad, because i feel
like i wanna die and i dont want to,
i dont know, its confusing
sometimes im happy but then i think about him and everything
goes sad,
everything gets mad
everything sucks.
i need help, i need help from my friends, my parents, everything
because i know im getting sick im getting sick of my sadness
im getting sick of being sick
i dont wanna LOVE!
I REALLY WANT TO STOP LOVING!
LOVING MAKES ME SICK!
IT MAKES ME EAT MUCH
AND SOMETIMES MAKES ME STAY WITHOUT EATING FOR
DAYS
I CAN DIE
I CAN CRY
I CAN TRY
AND IT WONT WORK!
listening to sad music and thinking about him i do all the time!
its not normal, its REALLY bad, pleeeeease
help me pleaaaaasseeee
make him look at me and say '' i think i love her ''
make him fall for me!
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
PLEASE
ill do anything for it
ill never yell at anyone !
ill never have fights with my mum
ill be perfect at school
i wont do anything wrong
i wont lie i wont cry
i just want him to be mine
please make my wish be true
please make him mine
its all i want
and if u make him mine ill be the happiest girl ever
ill be like seriously REALLY happy,
you dont know how much i love him its crazy its stupid its weird its
DIFFERENT.
its not a crush, its not a summer love, its not love, its like when
you can do anything for someone
and its true
i MEAN IT
i really mean it
like, you know when you feel sad for no
reason and then you start
crying and still think its for no reason
but then your heart beats and says someones name?
then you get like ooooh i think thats why im crying, im crying
because of him.
i want to be perfect i think, maybe if im perfect he will like me :(
you and me make everything perfect, pleeeeeeeease BE MINE,
ill die for you
if you want me to.
i can do anything for you
and i mean it
its everything for me
everything for me is you
and you are everything,
i bet i love you more than your mum does haha
i love you more than
anything :(
its not funny, its not to make anyone laugh reading this, its really serious, its bad really bad its like
when you want to die.
i cant change my love for you, i cant just say '' i dont love him
anymore '' because I DO!
and i said i wouldnt like you anymore more than
120000000000000 million times and it didnt work.
i never thought i would love,
i never thought i would know what love meant,
but now i do, and its weird, because its a feeling
that can change
anything you know,
its like when someone means everything to you,
and that person sometimes loves you but this love is not
big its not enough to you,
its sad when you love, to me its like dying, loving is a
different way of saying dying,
why am i in tears? i just need you here
i just need your love more than anything,
words cant describe everything i feel and felt for you
its like the BIGGEST LOVE ever.
its! seriously you mean anything to me
if someone asked me what i most loved in the whole world
i would say '' my parents of course '' but i actually
would say your name, if i could, if i wasnt embarrassed to say it.
god, what do i do??????
please tell me what to do!
please change his mind
HE LOVES ME
HE WILL LOVE ME TOMORROW
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS
HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS

2010-04-04T04:42:00.004-07:00

the things i hate about you.

i hate the way you stare.
i hate the way you dont even care.

ok

i hate the way you ''play''
and even more how you dont stay.

i hate your smile
i hate your hair

i hate when i see you and i get no air.

i hate the way you think,
and the way you wink.

the way you think makes me angry, the way you wink makes me
nervous.

i hate the way you forget,
and the way i want to hug you and you wont let.

i hate how much you're afraid,
to love in my own way.

i hate how you hate chocolate,
and how sweet you still are.

i hate your hates,
and i still hate your loves.

i hate the way you like same things as me,
i hate the way you dont see it.

i hate how you lie,
and how you're not mine.

i hate the way you made me cry,
and the way you didnt try.

i hate how you make me feel, and even how i like you still.

i hate your drugs
but you are mine.

i hate how you flirt
and how you are such a jerk.

i hate how i hate you,
and even more how i love you.

i hate so much your lies and how you make me cries.

i hate that bullshit you made me go through,
i hate the shit my life turned to because of you.

i hate your jokes,
i hate what you chose.

i hate your hugs,
and how i wish to heard your words.

i hate the way you used me,
and i hate the reason i didnt use you.

i hate how you ignore,
and i hate how you're always not sure.

i hate how i annoy you,
and how much you say that.

i hate why you cant be next to me,
and hate how you dont kiss me.

i hate how you love her,
i hate how im better than her.

i hate how you act,
i hate how you make me feel.

i hate how you always do that,
and i hate that im afraid you always will.

i hate that she loves you,
i hate that i love you more.
i hate that you dont love both.

maybe i hate everything on you,
or maybe im just lying that i hate you.

i hate that i loved you,
i hate that i love you,
and i hate the reason you make me love you,

i hate the reason that you're perfect, i hate that you're not mine.

i hate how i tried,
i hate how i cried.

i hate how much i love you,
and how much i need you.

2010-04-04T04:42:00.003-07:00

i wish there was time for us.
why did you erase what happened?
why did you just forget me like i was nothing?
i loved you, i still do, i always will.......

2010-04-04T04:42:00.001-07:00

there is no me without you,
you means everything
your the only one
your the love i need
your the one i want
your the hugger i like
your the one who makes me change
the one who makes me sad
the one who makes me happy
the one who i love
the one who will always be in my heart
the one who i dont see anymore
the one who doesnt love me
the one who doesnt change
your just the best
when im a mess
ur the one who makes me feel beautiful
even though im not good enough
your the one i dont have anymore.
your the one i miss
the one i wish i had
i thought u were perfect
never had a choice to change it
crashed to your loving way
i need to love you its just unbelievable
how it doesnt change
i need ur smile
i need uuuuuuuuuuuuu

2010-04-04T04:41:00.002-07:00

im thinking of chris right now haha ummm wow im listening to
best i ever had so thats probs why im thinking of him though.
i would like to have enough words to represent how much i love you..
i would like to show you how much i cried.
and tell you how much you meant.
i dont know what happened but things just changed.
nothing is the same.
my love for you is just...a crush?
ummmmmm when i think of you my body goes just i dont know
it seens like im dreaming, floating or something...
baby you're my everything
you're what i ever wanted
we can do it real big

bigger than u ever done it
you will be up in anything
ahhaah that song is just...perfect.
i miss when you used to say that that song was for me...
the fact is that i thought we could actually do it big
bigger than anything
i cant believe i fell for you.
agora aquele sentimento volta sabe,
eu fico.. eu nao sei parece que um ar profundo entra em mim
meu estomago fica gelado
nao tem como explicar
tudo que eu senti,
isso vai marcar,
mas pelo menos tu me fez crescer
crescer por fora e tambem por dentro..
eu era aquela menininha quando te conheci,
agora eu sou aquela mulher que sonha contigo.
eu cresci muito eu posso te falar...
aquelas noites chorando...?
elas me deixaram MAIS FORTE.
elas me mostraram que eu consigo passar por pior que isso.
que isso nao me derruba,
que eu ainda estou no topo.
que eu nunca vou me rebaixar por um homem.
nem por um menino como tu.
aqueles berros e emploracoes pra tu me amar..
nunca mais vai acontecer.
eh bom que tu entenda..
que tu vai ser o que vai chorar.
nos proximos tempos.
eu nao vou me rebaixar.
seja do meu nivel,
e voce vai entender,
que sentimentos existem e infelizmente eu tive por voce.
mas passou,
voce mudou...
tudo mudou, nao eh?
me deixa feliz que voce me mostrou,
que amor pode acontecer
que a magia existe..
mas ela acabou.
vou viver a minha vida,
quero ser feliz apartir de agora,
nao quero mais chorar,
e outra coisa...
se eu tivesse ficado mais tempo contigo.. talvez hoje eu nao seria quem eu sou.
talvez eu poderia ter feito coisas que eu me arrependeria.
me dado mais do que eu podia.
e outro problema eh que..
nos dois infelizmente pensamos igual.
ou pensavamos eu nao sei mas eu sei que tu pode entender..
o ruim eh que tu nao quer.
nao quer entender o que eu sinto ou senti..
eu nao sei se aquele amor por ti ainda existe,
mas sei que quando pensei disso minha barriga ficou gelada.
entrou aquele ar de novo, inacreditavel.
nao da pra acreditar que o mundo faz eu te amar.
eh engracado se tu pensar.. mas eh triste quando isso me faz chorar.
mas um dia.. eu posso te dizer.. um dia.. voce vai estar no meu lugar.
se eh que ja nao esta.. rs
porque aquela magia acabou?
porque aquele 'namoro' nao durou?
porque de noite eu fui quem chorou?
porque as mentiras me levaram a loucuras?
porque saudade nao traz felicidade?
eu lembro que tinha dias que eu ia pro parque chorar,
eu lembro daquela semana que eu fiquei sem internet
e todos os dias eu fiquei chorando porque tu terminou comigo
no dia que minha melhor amiga brigou comigo e foi tudo
por culpa dela.
mas agora eu rio porque BEM FEITO agora ela esta
sentindo o que eu senti
na verdade eu nao rio, porque eu nao sou ma.. mas
eu tenho motivos..
porque eh engracado,
o que ela fez pra mim..
agora aconteceu com ela. e provavelmente ela me entende,
ela deve ter chorado.. e deve muito ter lembrado do que ela fez pra mim.
toda vez que eu lembro de ti vem aquele sentimento
aquele ar profundo aquele magia...
a magia linda volta e fica por pouco tempo,
somente quando eu lembro de ti que eu tenho esse sentimento!
eh estranho explicar... eh mais estranho ainda amar... haha eu gosto de rimar >.>
e .. eu nao sei.. porque aconteceu mas eu TENHO CERTEZA que por
alguma razao muito importante eu te conheci,
tu foi muito importante na minha vida.
eu tenho certeza disso..
talvez no futuro eu vou te 'reconhecer' e a gente vai se gostar,
eu vou ser o que tu realmente 'quer' entende..
because everytime we touch i feel this feeling...
eu quero voce comigo mais que tudo,
o ruim eh que nao posso ter,
e o pior eh que eu vou sempre ter que entender...
o unico abraco de verdade que eu mais gostei foi o seu.
e provavelmente tu nem lembra do meu...
mas nao tem problema :)
eu vou recuperar aquele ar que eu te dei.
tu vai ser meu como tu deveria ser.
o passado nao nos deixou porque nao era a hora mas nao vai demorar..
um dia isso vai acontecer.......
tu vai ser meu e assim vai ser.
a gente pode se casar.. quem sabe? rs
mas nao sei...
talvez no futuro tu nao seja o que eu quero..
talvez tu nao trabalhe, talvez tu seja ninguem na vida
e eu vou te olhar e te falar.. '' eu te avisei, pra parar.. pra fazer certo e tu
nao aceitou '' ...
eu quero conhecer meninos novos agora..
quero conhecer pessoas melhores que tu.
e existe muitas.. eu posso te dizer..

eu queria te abracar sabe,,
muuiiiiiiiito que eu queria te cheirar hahaha
tu tem um cheiro tao bom, eu lembro disso....
eu lembro de tudo sobre ti..
assim mesmo sabendo que faz tempo que algo aconteceu..
minha loucura por ti nao acabou.
amor de verdade nao acaba.
isso que me da medo, eu nao acredito que tao cedo estou amando..
nao acredito que isso possa ser possivel..
A M O R .. uma palavra tao diferente, tao magica, tao alegre e triste ao mesmo
tempo... A seria de Alegria. M de Magica. O de Otimo. R de .. Rafaela haah umm
nao.. to brincando.. mas R poderia ser de hummmm.. Rebelde? Pode ser rs
As pessoas ficam rebeldes quando amam, elas ficam com aquela alegria inacreditavel, elas sentem a magica gelada, esse sentimento eh otimo.
rssssss eu amor escrever uau que estranho nem sabia que tinha uma paixao
assim para escrever......... :)
eu tava lendo conversas minhas e do chris de muuuuuuito
tempo atras tipo, uau..
que saudades de quando ele me tratava bem rs
que saudades de quando ele ate falava comigo
foda-se a proxima vez qe eu falar com ele eu vou dizer tudo que eu sinto
assim mesmo sabendo que ele nem vai dar bola mais tipo
ai cara
eh engracado eu ate ri agora mas tipo
eu tenho tantaaaaaaaaaaas saudades de quando ele era pra ser MEU.
sabe
tipo
ele eh
PERFEITO.
ele eh tudo que eu quero e tudo que eu nao quero tbm :(
eu acho que vou desser ir ver tv sei la to triste fiquei lendo umas conversas me deixou taoooo triste ai cara nao vou conseguir dormir agora :(
eu vi que... o chris me amava cara! serio! e eu amava ele..
mas a gente nunca podia ficar juntos entende :(
e dae agora.. ele me odeia, e eu amo ele.
e isso nao muda nada
e eu to aqui quase chorando na cama sem ninguem pra mandar mensagem
rs
:(
fudeu eu odeio *AMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO muio* ele. :(

2010-04-04T04:41:00.001-07:00

eu te amo mais que tudo,
tudo mesmo
eu sei que me faz mal e muito triste mas isso nao muda sabe?
isso nao pode mudar eu acho
isso eh mais que tudo
maior que tudo
impossivel alguem te amar mais do que eu

):

2010-04-04T04:40:00.004-07:00

love makes you cry, maybe it makes you smile but in the end it
makes you cry.
sometimes i want to die because i know i wanna stop to cry but
i cant because
i met you, and since that i loved you.
love means death, i bet it does.
i bet love is nothing
i bet its just a word that liars like to use
when you used to say you loved me i used to trust you.
now you say you hate me and i trust you more.
it sucks when you love,
it sucks when that person doesnt love you
and gosh i need you!
and please get it i love you.

You

You make me wanna cry.
You make me wanna die.
Sometimes it's funny but now saying that, it isn't.
It was good when i met you,
It was awesome when you lied that you loved me.
I used to love your lies,
They used to make me happy.
But when I saw the real you,
I cried.
I said I was gonna die!
It seems easy for you to say you dont love me.
But its hard for me to say i dont love you.
It seems easy for me to love you
But it seems hard for you to understand how much i want you next
to me.
It was funny when we played your game,
your game of lies,
it was funny when i used to trust you.
It was funnier when you made me cry!
It was more funny when i wanted to die.
You dont know how much i cried
You think you're perfect
and you think you're the best.
I'm sorry, but you made me see that
You're ugly.
You're not funny.
You're not a good person.
You're mean.
You smell like shit.
You don't know what love means.
You don't even know how to spell.

But Don't Worry baby I'm never gonna tell anyone that you
don't have anyfeelings.
I'm never gonna tell anyone how much I cried.
I used to cry every morning, every day, and every night.
Yes, It was Really sad.
It was sad when you left me.
It was sad when you lied to me.
It was sad when you used me.
And it was more sad when I saw everything that was happening and
I noticed that
I would do anything for you.
I would even try to kill myself for you. I actually tried to. :x
I would stop eating because of you.
I would loose all my real friends because of you.
I would notice that there is no me without you.
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry for trying to make you stay,
I'm sorry for crying for you.
I'm sorry for being scared of loving someone else because of you.
I'm sorry for being stupid.
I'm really sorry for being ugly.
I'm more sorry for not being funny.
I'm sorry for not being enough to you.
I just wanted you to know that I love you.

Because baby you're actually the best, maybe you're not the best
for some people but you are the best for rafa.
And when i grow up and if i see you i will run for you and tell you
that i never forgot you. And never will. Maybe that's not our time,
Maybe there is no
time for us. But, baby, you're not mine i guess, i wish you were!
i wish you were here
and i cry because of it. im sorry.

2010-04-04T04:40:00.003-07:00

i changed my look to emo
i changed my smile to crying
i changed my friends to nothing
i changed pop to hip-hop
i changed my best friend to computer
i changed my healthy life to not eating
i changed the guy i liked for you
i changed my heart to broken and it worths nothing to you.

im not calling you baby anymore.
im not saying i love you anymore.
im not acting like i like you anymore.
im not changing my mind and my opnion about you till
you see that you love me.

im everything you could have and you still dont see it?!
i changed my friends and you still didnt want me.
i changed my clothes and you still didnt want me.
i changed my style and you still didnt want me.
i changed my life and you still didnt want me.
i changed my hair and you still didnt want me.
i changed my songs and you still didnt want me.
i changed my way to dance and you still didnt want me.
i changed my way to be and you still didnt want me.
i changed my way to talk and you still didnt want me.
i changed everything and you still dont want me.
what do i have to do?
i need to have wings?
i need to be the hottest girl in the world?
i need to be a nerd?
i need to be the best in sports?
i need to know how to sing?
i need to be the funniest person ever?
i need to be the most bitchy girl ever?
what do i need to be????
i need to be like.. her?
right?
is that what you want me to be?
you want me to be fat like her?
you want me to have pimples all over my face like her?
you want me to be ugly like her?
you want me to drink like her?
you want me to have sex like her?
you want me to be a slut like her?
you want me to..
you do...
but..
im not changing to that bad for you.

2010-04-04T04:40:00.001-07:00

today i died.
i killed my feelings.
i died my heart.
i died.
and you killed me.
you destroyed my feelings.
you broke my heart.
you broke me,
you don't know what you did,
it seems easy not to love me,
but it seems hard to understand how much i love you.

2010-04-04T04:39:00.002-07:00

im sorry for being immature
maybe im not but im still not good for you
maybe u think ur too good
or maybe im actually not enough
i dont know wats happening to me
first love?
maybe?
i dont know
i just know that it never ends
and never will
because ur
the
only
one
i
can
actually
love.
and
im
serious
i
dont
lie
to
you
i never did!
im sorry if ur not ready to have a relationship?
im sorry if u dont think im ready to have a relationship?
im sorry for loving u
im really sorry for not forgeting u !

2010-04-04T04:39:00.001-07:00

one thing girls need to learn before they die.

BOYS ARE FOR MOMENTS!

... FRIENDS ARE FOR ALWAYS. =) hehehehehehee

its true because like if you notice boys worth NOTHING and
always in the end you will end up crying for them
because they are dickheads okok
lol some of them are not BUT
most are
so BEWARE of the DICKHEADS.
i always meet dickheads seriously,
and i always go out with dickheads as well.
seriously.
boys make me cry,
they make me try,
and then they make me wanna die.

omfgggg at school this year we are like having to make those really
annoying poems
and i need to make one about music like for next week
AND PLEASE HELP ME!
its a thingy called '' I hear the music '' and
we have to do a poem about that thingy and
the BEST ONE gets $400 dollars in cash!
i knowwww its lots of money aye lol and like yeah i really want it.
so please help me :D brb toilet
back
anyway i dont know why but like i really like to make
poems about boys
and i keep using the word ''cry'' a lot haha i think you noticed
btw lol
ok im gonna try to make a poem about a guy now ok ok lol dont laugh!

i love the way you stare,
even if you dont care.
i love the way you cut your hair.

i love the way you smile,
and even when i cry i still wish love meant you and i.

i feel sorry for you sometimes,
because you lie to me.

i feel sorry for me lots of times,
because when you lie you make me happy,
even when i wanna die.

but then in the end i end up wanting to cry,
because of you
because of your lies.

woooooooooooooooooooooooo, that was sad really sad im bad really
mad
but please dont tell my mum and dad. lol i had to say that!
goshhh that parody of tik tok makes meeee soooo mad really bad
fucking sad
ok sorry ahahahah
mad + sad + bad = raff with no you. lol

i miss your smile.
i miss your arms.
i miss your eyes.
i miss the way you stare.
bubububbububububububu i dont wanna talk about him but it just
comes like omfggg i cant stop thinking of him.

:(

):

:)

(:

im happy aye... - awkward silence says no.

- i love the way you stare, even if you dont care. (8)))) ' ;/
i mixx yuh, babe please come back to me!!!!!! lol

my love is deep,
its not small
and it doesnt go quick.

... isnt it really weird when people change and they
get REALLY hot when they get older?
its like omfg you look so hoooot and you used to look shit.

PENIS PENIS PENIS@
WHAAAAT/?////?? AT 21:47PM ON TV A PENIS???
THATS WHY THE LITTLE KIDS ALL KNOW WHAT SEX MEANS
ALREADY
BECAUSE
PEOPLE KEEP SHOWING PENISES ON TV AT 21:47, NO LIKE
IM WATCHING THAT SHIT ON TV morri/

2010-04-04T04:38:00.000-07:00

i dont know what to do with my life anymore
i hate my mum.
i hate my dad.
i hate my ''friends''.
i hate everything.
except chris.
it sucks when you only have one reason to live,
and that reason wants you to die.
it sucks.

i loved you once,
i love you still.
i always have and i always will.

i think i might die.
because without you i rather cry.

you showed me perfection,
i showed you love.
you didnt want love,
so you took from me the perfection,
but i left with you my love.

i bet one day the stars will come down,
that day you will see me and notice what you lost.

i think i'm gonna cry,
because i know i wanna die.

you were everything to me,
i was one of the girls to you,
you still are everything to me,
now i am the worse person in the world for you.

i liked when you said you loved me,
i didnt like when i found out it wasnt true.

one of the differences between boys and girls is,
that girls have feelings, boys have lies.

i wanted you to show me your love.

i gave you my heart!
NOW GIVE IT BACK DICKHEAD!?

Thank you guys, i hope you like it. xo

2010-04-04T04:35:00.002-07:00

it hurts

it sucks

it hurts me so bad to know that i love someone who doesnt give

a shit about me,

it makes me cry so much

i dont know what to do right?

PLEASE GOD MAKE ME GO TO INNES'S HOUSE AND

SEE CHRIS ON THE BUS.

pleeeeeeease and he will see me and he will be like OMG I STIL

LOVE HER!

pleeeeaase do that !

i miss your smile seriously i miss you so much

there is only one thing i care about and its you ):

i wanted to know sometimes what people think about me and

about what i do,

like i wanted to know if they hate me or if

they like me or if they love me,

because i just wish i knew if people think im pretty or

not, i dont think im pretty

but like some ppl do its weird.. anyway im listening to

hero by mariah carey and

im actually listening to all of her depressed songs haah

and im picturing one day

me and innes talking on the bus and chris like next to us listening

to all but not talking to us and me not looking at him and

him thinking '' omg why is she

so awesome and perfect? '' haha .. god please make

this moment be true :P lols

ps: I LOVE NOTEPAD! lol l l l l l l l l its awesome D:

btw i need to go to the toilet DDD: brb

back, omggg im having diahea lol i shudnt say that but idc :S lol.

i need a boyfriend! seriously, maybe if i find the perfect

boyfriend i would forget ----- ?

yeah.. like idk :s lol i was watching tv and there is that

guy that reminds me of that person

SOOOOOOO MUCH! and that guy is like sooooooooooooo

cute like that person, i just felt like

hugging the tv :( seriously if my mum wasnt next to me

i would hug the tv D: lol

sad i know ahahaha . i just wish he could hug meeeeeeeeeeeee

and love meeeee and aaaaaaaaarg ):

we belong together (8) awwwwwwwwww. that was sweet

i know lol ):

i thought anyguy would like a perfect girlfriend, but he doesnt..

so he is gay? or he is a girl ? :/ lol

hehe, i think if i dont talk about him i wont like him ? :S

its confusing how much i feel inside for

hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim <3

i know i belong with him and he belongs with me!!!!!!!!111111111

11111 okkkkkkk he does, he is mine, he needs

to cry for me, he needs to feel love for me!

he needs to feel sorry for everything he did ):

i loved him so much ..........he didnt love me ...

like at alllllll DDDDD:

10 things i hate about you.

2010-04-04T04:35:00.001-07:00

I HATE YOUR HAIR

I HATE YOUR EYES

I HATE YOUR MOUTH

I HATE YOUR FACE.

I HATE THE WAY YOU DRESS.

I HATE THE WAY YOU WERE TO ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU LIE TO ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU PLAYED WITH ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU ACT.

I HATE THE WAY YOU ARE!

.. and i hate loving you even if i know

that i hate the way you are and the way you act i still love you.

2010-04-04T04:33:00.000-07:00

2010-04-04T04:32:00.000-07:00

2010-03-28T08:14:00.000-07:00

you wanna play cool but you're loosing me...

no feelings...

2010-03-28T08:09:00.002-07:00

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: hey

You: do you have feelings

You: ?

Stranger: um

Stranger: yeah

You: did you ever trully love?

Stranger: yes

You: are you m or f?

Stranger: male

You: how old?

Stranger: 18

You: do you have a girlfriend?

You: >.>]

Stranger: yeah

You: :D

You: whats your name?

Stranger: richard

You: awesome, im gonna post this on my blog now lol say hey

You: >.>

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

2010-03-28T08:09:00.001-07:00

Se você tiver uma chapinha, um perfume, e um batom vermelho .. você pode ser perfeita para qualquer um.

2010-03-28T08:04:00.000-07:00

beautiful girls are all over the world..

2010-03-28T08:02:00.000-07:00

eu queria meus sonhos para serem de verdade, porque neles você sempre está me abraçando mas eu acordo e escuto tu me odiando.

2010-03-28T08:01:00.002-07:00

how many tears have you had? x

2010-03-28T08:01:00.001-07:00

Você é feliz?

2010-03-28T08:00:00.001-07:00

Sonhar, viver, amar.. tudo pode acontecer .. mas nem sempre ao mesmo tempo e nem sempre vão te fazer feliz. hm

2010-03-28T07:59:00.001-07:00

Nunca confunda fantasia com realidade, porque fantasia você sempre irá ter.. nos seus sonhos.. e realidade é só coisas de verdade. fato manow rçrçr

2010-03-28T07:58:00.002-07:00

A verdade é que as melhores pessoas que você poderá conhecer na sua vida, moram no outro lado do mundo e tem 3% de chances de o conhecer.

2010-03-28T07:58:00.001-07:00

i dont wanna miss ya..

2010-03-28T07:57:00.000-07:00

Hey, hey, Soul Sister IS THE BEST SONG EVER!

2010-03-28T07:56:00.000-07:00

Some people don't know what they want, and when they do.. They can't have it.

2010-03-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

Vocês não acham que a maioria de fãs do Justin Bieber já tiveram um coração quebrado? Tipo, eu sempre achei ele um otário mas agora eu acho ele perfeito e amo as músicas. alok rçrçrç

2010-03-20T10:36:00.001-07:00

i need you here,

baby look at me

talk to me

be with me

kiss me

use me

and even lie to me.

but just be here with me.

2010-03-20T10:34:00.000-07:00

and i dont know why, cant take my eyes out of you.

2010-03-20T10:33:00.000-07:00

i miss you soooo much i miss everything on you i miss the way you treated me i miss you more than anything :(

2010-03-20T10:31:00.001-07:00

eu queria tanto carinho,

eu queria alguem pra abracar quando estou triste.

e pra rir com quando eu estou feliz.

queria uma amiga pra compartilhar segredos,

e queria uma mae de verdade pra me amar.

queria amor de verdade

e nao queria falsidade.

queria uma familia,

e nao gente que so me humilha.

queria felicidade,

mas queria que isso fosse na minha realidade.

2010-03-10T09:56:00.001-08:00

i am so sick and tired of you and your lies

im doing a homework about earthquakes and i just copied on wikipedia?

2010-03-10T05:52:00.000-08:00

An earthquake (also known as a quake, tremor, or temblor) is the result of a sudden release of energy in the Earth's crust that createsseismic waves. Earthquakes are recorded with a seismometer, also known as a seismograph. The moment magnitude (or the related and mostly obsolete Richter magnitude) of an earthquake is conventionally reported, with magnitude 3 or lower earthquakes being mostlyimperceptible and magnitude 7 causing serious damage over large areas. Intensity of shaking is measured on the modified Mercalli scale.

At the Earth's surface, earthquakes manifest themselves by shaking and sometimes displacing the ground. When a large earthquake epicenteris located offshore, the seabed sometimes suffers sufficient displacement to cause a tsunami. The shaking in earthquakes can also trigger landslides and occasionally volcanic activity.

In its most generic sense, the word earthquake is used to describe any seismic event — whether a natural phenomenon or an event caused by humans — that generates seismic waves. Earthquakes are caused mostly by rupture of geological faults, but also by volcanic activity, landslides, mine blasts, and nuclear experiments. An earthquake's point of initial rupture is called its focus or hypocenter. The term epicenterrefers to the point at ground level directly above the hypocenter.

2010-03-10T05:45:00.000-08:00

eu me preocupo muito com a sua opniao, ja ate virou paixao.

2010-03-10T05:39:00.001-08:00

eu to gostando tanto de rimar ultimamente euri

eu te amei,

amei tanto que chorei,

chorei e quase matei,

quase me matei.

perdi meus amigos,

fiz seus pedidos.

menti pra mim mesma,

tentei ver beleza em quem só tem moleza.

agora eu esqueci,

não quero mais saber,

e nunca mais vou querer morrer.

deletei tua imagem,

e o que eu via era somente miragem,

te exclui do msn,

porque não quero ter gente que só ta na tpm.

entendi a verdade,

que eu fingia que não era realidade

tentei mentir,

me enganar,

me acabar

e agora eu percebi que você não pode amar.

hihi

2010-03-09T10:55:00.001-08:00

one of the big problems of love is that when you act really ''easy'' to someone the person wont like you because the person will think '' ooh this chick is too easy, i can do better than her :D '' and he should be thinking '' i need to get that chick! '' and then you ''THE CHICK'' will act like he is a piece of shit, and then he will be everytime trying to get with you and then one day he will fall for you, because you're not easy so he will like to play your love game... get it? lol i dont think you did but seriously GIRLS DONT BE TOO EASY!

2010-03-09T10:52:00.000-08:00

how to forget a boy?

ask yourself 10 reasons you should love him.

then ask yourself 15 you shouldn't love him.

if you get more than 15 in the second one dont love him and if you get more than 10 in the first one, just try, but if he is being mean or just not talking to you at all just TELL HIM TO FUCK OFF! and then start looking best as you can to make him think 'omg i lost the best chance of my life' :D

2010-03-09T10:50:00.000-08:00

how old do you think you act like? and how old do people say you act like? :D ANSWER PLEASE.

2010-03-09T10:46:00.006-08:00

hey guys, i was posting before stuff from my diary from like 2/3 weeks ago.. well i think my 'opnion' changed after that, seriously, because i dont know i just think im too young to be crying over a boy. and girls who cry over boys are just 'stupid', you know.. so im gonna change, im gonna start looking like not caring about my looks anymore you know.. because i dont care anymore, im just in primary school and next year when i be year 8 i can actually care and look better but now im just gonna study and let my life go, because even my mum and her boyfriend told me i keep acting older than im and yea.. so its bad lol like they said i have 'attitude' and its bad... idk, i dont think its bad because everyone needs it but i have too much.. lol and it makes me act older than im so yeah but still im 12 and im happy with that aye heheheheheehe,. . .. so yeah hows life ppls? :D

im happy today..........not... well, im ok with my life i guess (:

2010-03-09T10:46:00.005-08:00

you will always be a part of me

you will always be in my heart

you will always be in my memories

you will always be like that,

you will never change,

you will never stop.

and

i will always cry.

now everytime i see you i pretend im fine

when im actually wanting to go and hug you,

go and say i love you,

go and kiss you,

go and smell you aye.

2010-03-09T10:46:00.003-08:00

i lost a part of me i lost a part of my happiness or i mean i actually lost my happiness

he was everything i could have, he was perfect he was like omg he was just THE BEST.

he is like everything a girl would like to have :DDDDDD he is so cute

so sweeet

he is a baby ;DDDDDD'

browww, he is the bestest

there is not guy who beats him as cutenesssssssss,

he just got me at all.

i fell for him,,,,,,,,, well thats not new lol but

like i cant explain anymore?

i just think.. he is handsome *-*

2010-03-09T10:46:00.001-08:00

loving you is sad

loving you is really bad.

when i cry its because of you

when i'm shy is because im seeing you

you dont know how its

you dont know how it works

you dont know how to love

but to break a girls heart you do.

you dont know what it feels

you dont know how its to be in my place

you dont know how its to love someone

because you dont know what love is.

loving you doesnt make me glad

it makes me sad

i dont tell people

i dont tell anyone

i dont want someone to know

how sad im inside.

i dont want anyone to understand me

and i know they cant

no one can understand what i felt inside since that day

no one can understand loving you.

maybe you dont know why i would cry for you,

maybe you dont know why i would die for you,

but baby dont worry im not telling anyone you dont have feelings.

its bad when im sad,

it sucks and doesnt make me glad,

the problem is that im always sad.

its because of you and

for you its not even bad.

i think jesus doesnt love me,

because if he did he wouldnt do what he is doing to me.

christopher young,

you know how dificult its to love someone who acts like it hates you?

do you know what love means? it means when you cry for someone,

when you want to see someone more than anything,

when sometimes you even loose your friends because of someone,

when you say you would die for someone and you mean it.

I guess it's done,

I guess for you nothing happened.

Maybe you're right,

maybe that feeling was only mine,

and maybe love doesnt mean anything to you.

Well, i think i should stop,

stop loving you aye,

but i cant,

i dont know why

i dont know how

i just know that my love for you doesnt have an end.

Maybe it will never stop,

maybe it will hurt me more,

maybe something bad is gonna happen because of it,

maybe my days crying in my bedroom worth nothing for you.

maybe my best friend that i lost because of you worth nothing

maybe im not good enough for you

maybe you're too good for everyone aye

and maybe my heart broken worths nothing.

2010-03-09T10:45:00.005-08:00

i hate you.

i hate the way you talk.

i hate the way you act.

i hate the way you dress.

i hate the way you are.

i hate your hair.

i hate you eyes.

i hate your mouth.

i hate your friends.

i hate everything you do.

and i hate the way i can't stop loving you.

2010-03-09T10:45:00.003-08:00

was it strange when you first loved someone?

was it strange when you first kissed someone?

was it strange when you felt someone touching your hand?

was it strange when you saw someone and you felt like saying '' HOT ! '' for the first time?

was it strange when you wanted to die?

2010-03-09T10:45:00.001-08:00

hello, today was ok

i went to the beach with my mum, carol, elaine and mark and it was good actually,

while i was swimming with carol i saw MICHAEL, ETHAN AND JAMIE!

YES, the people who used/go to my school D: i was like omgggggggggg.

and then i got embarrassed because they were there so it changed everything like,

i went back and sat with my mum because i wouldn't swim in front of them right?

and then they went home i guess so i just went to swim again, teehe.

well, yeah.. then i went to marks house after etccccccccccc.

now im on my computer BUT i have no internet because im at marks bubu ):

but tomorrow im going to school and after that im going home i guess, yay .

well, i like sleeping and coming at marks but like, i dont know i just

im tired.

i think i dont love anyone at the moment, well,

when i loved him, i cried lots for him so i dont think i still love him because,

if i did i would still cry.

Maybe not but, i just think there is no boy in my head you know and it's

good really good because BOYS are DICKS.

and DICKS are NO GOOD for YOU.

when i find the PERFECT guy, who actually worths my love,

ill love him.

ill give him everything like i did to that DICKHEAD,

who worths.. nothing.. well maybe he worths something and its SHANNON.

MUAHAHAHAHA. lol.

well... yeah im happy :D kinda...

its weird because for some reason i never feel happy you know,

i just wish i had a perfect life.

with perfect hair.

perfect eyes.

perfect teeth.

perfect body.

perfect boyfriend.

and perfect parents.

but i dont, hehe, and one day, i will.

one day when i grow up or even now when im small, ill have great everything.

i know i will,

because i worth it.

:D :D :D

xuxu xaxa xoxo for you. ! :D:D:D

.................. Q of da day : how many times have you thoughten

about your future? :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD'

welllllllllll. i think i have more than i have cried :| :| .. and its many i bet you, lols.

BUBU BABA BOBO ................. BIBI 44444444444444 YOU!

RANDOM THINGS THAT I LIKE TO SAY:

IM HORNY, IM ASIAN! DUH

I LIKE POTATOES.

CAN I HUG YOU :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

I LOVE YOU, JOK33333333333333333Z.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

can i tell you guys something?

i hate when people go like '' HEY HEY HEY HEY '' then i go like '' wow, hey,

what happened to make you so happy ? lol '' and the person goes like

'' nothing lolzzzz, '' and starts talking about their BORING and annoying life that

they have.

gosh i dont wanna fuckin* listen to you talking about some guy who you like ok!

its just.. ........ stupid!

but what sucks is that i do that to some people as well :P

well, now i understand what they feel when i start talking about ***** . lol.

dont you sometimes feel like you cannot stop saying '' lol '' ? isnt just LOL the WORD!

BROOOOOOOOO,,,,, I LOL ALL DA TYM!

........not in real life.

because im just some sad emo faggot pig...........true!!!!11111

I LIKE PIGS :BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB'

PIG PIG PIG > DOESNT IT LOOK LIKE IDK IT

REMINDS ME OFFF................................ PE...................NIX.............

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. PERVAAATTTTTT.

NA, JKS, IM NOT PERVERT OF COURSE...

NAAAAA, IM NOT. .. .. .. . IM AN ANGEL .... IM AN SEXY HOT ANGEL........

AND ASIAN.........

LOOOOOOOOOOL, MAYBE IM PERVAAAT........ MAYBE IM NOT..

WHO KNOWS?

WHO CARES?

***** DOESNT!

HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT ANYTHIIIIIIIING ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH , I LOVE MY

NEEX

NA JKS

I DONT HAVE ONE...............

OR DO I? :############ :o

LAWLLLLLLLLLLLLL BRAWWWWW AI LYKKK IUUUUU!!!111

KRREEEEEEEEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.

ok, i hope you dont get what i just said,

because if you did..........imdead D: seriously......

kraaaxxx kriiiixxxx krooooxxx kreeeexxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 4 YOU!!!!!!!!111111111

anyway.. i think i might go to sleep ;DDDDDDDD not/

ok i was lying to you. sorry :#

IM SUCH A LIAR!!!!11

lol

but i should sleep... my mum said DONT TURN THE TV ON RAFAELA!!!11 and

i was like ;oooo ok then BITCH@!!!!1

na, i didnt say bitch, i just wanted to........... DDDD: bitch .

bitch bitchhhhh BITCH GO FUCK A DOG!

na jks..................who fucks a dog??????

rafa does........ :|

NA JKS JKS JKS

i would never fuck a dog.............lawl.

KEXXCHION : would you fuck a DOG? :::::::::::::::::|

if you said you would.........please dont talk to me anymore u_u lol euri/

ok now im going to watch a movie bai bai FAGGOTS WHO HAVE NO LIFE AND

READ SOME STUPID BLOG MADE FROM SOME 12 YEARS OLD CHICK WITH NO LIFE!!!!!!!!111111111

jks, but i actually have no life sad sad lol bye bai bjs bjs .//'////

oooohh btwwwwww BJS in portuguese means xoxo so im just saying xoxo instead of

blowjob LOL .... i didnt actually lol, i just felt like it i_i bye .

ai luv iu kreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeexy

2010-03-09T10:43:00.002-08:00

isnt it weird when everything changes in your life?

isnt it weird when you think about dying and in the next day you want to smile?

isnt it weird when you dont know what god means?

isnt it weird when you eat poo instead of bread?

isnt it weird when your friends dont say hi to you?

isnt it weird when your best friend ignores you?

isnt it weird when everything makes you think of someone?

isnt it weird when your mum hates you?

isnt it weird when your cold and you want to be hot but you still dont close the window?

isnt it weird when you love someone?

isnt it weird when you fall for someone?

2010-03-09T10:43:00.001-08:00

you know a lot of boys think i like them but

you're the only one

you will be up on anything

because you're the best one right

you're the fucking best and it always will be the same.

always the one i will like better on anything

you can have my heart

you can have everything

because i know you worth it

everything im doing, everything im going through..

you worth it.

you will be up on anything babe.

you make me feel happy even when i am sad

you make my heart go crazy

you make my life go happy

and you make me smile

you know some guys think i like them but

you're the only one.

you will be up on anything.

you make me feel better

you make me feel the best

you make my heart go crazy

and you make me go crazy as well.

i will be always there

always when you need me i will be there for you

you're perfect.

i cant see anything wrong with you.

well maybe you dont feel the same about me but

i dont care

you will always be up on anything

i love you,

i love your hair,

i love your eyes,

i love your smile!

i love the way you talk

i love the way you joke

i love everything

but i dont love the way you treat me..

but its ok because it doesnt matter ok

it will not change anything.

i had to notice by myself how much i needed you.

you will be up on anything!

you will always be the best

you will always be the one

you will always be the one i ever wanted.

it doesnt change.

it will never change.

my love for you is forever and forever doesnt end.

im sorry if i sound weird but

baby you will be always up on anything!

because you're the best!

my friends told me i had an obssesion,

i told them i was in love.

when i met you my heart told me what love meant.

love means everything for you,

it means that it's good but it can be bad,

it can be really sad,

it's really sad for me right now but i'm smilling,

because i know you're the best,

now i found out why the other guys are never the same as you,

the other guys always sound stupid,

the other guys always sound gay,

the other guys always sound dumb,

the other guys never sound like you.

the way you are, the way you were

and the way you will be are always the best.

im sorry if im crazy for you but

why would i not be if you are so perfect?

why would i not love you?

because you dont love me?

but i know one day you will!

im the best for you,

its from another life,

thats why its so big,

thats why it will never end!

its like up on anything,

i would give up my life for you.

i would do anything for you.

because you are the best.

the best i ever had.

and the best i will have again.

because i can!

because i want!

and because i will!

i can spend whatever on it

i can do anything for it!

it will always worth it.

you worth anything.

you make me love,

you make me happy,

you can make me sad but

it will worth it in the end

because i came here to love you

and you came here to love me

i know it,

i bet you i'm right.

my love is bigger than anything.

its sweeter than anything.

i love you baby.

because you can make me smile even when im crying

you can make me smile when im sad

you can be the best even if you're not

you are the only one

the only one who will always be up on anything.

the only one that i can actually love.

because you showed me what love meant and now i know what love is

and i know love doesnt end.

real love doesnt end.

you're the half of heart i need

you're what i need

you're what i want!

you are the one i will always miss

you are the one i will always cry for

you are the one i will always love

it's true,

it hurts me but it's true!

i know its true.

i know we should be together.

i know we will grow up together!

i know i met you in another life and

i know i'm here to make you happy again.

yes i sound crazy,

yes i sound stupid,

yes i sound really gay but

it's true.

its bigger then anything,

you will be up on anything,

you will always be the best one.

i can tell you.

you are the best ever. and

you will always be...

TUESDAY 16/02/2010.

2010-03-09T10:42:00.000-08:00

today, i woke up thinking of you and wondering why i let you go and you didnt come back to me,

i wish i was in ur arms, i wish i was with you, i wish you could love me and i wonder why you dont,

i think bout dying i think of you when im crying, i cried for you yesterday

im crying for you today i will cry for you tomorrow

i guess ur everything i need to have, i guess ur all i ever wanted,

i guess im gonna die loving you, coz i already live loving you and it doesnt stop,

its not just a crush, its not just a guy, its not just a summer love,

its more than that, its everything to me,

i would kill for you, i would die for you, i would do anything anything ANYTHING for you,

i would do anything to have you, and im dying for you,

i gave you my heart, and you broke it

i told you my feelings and you laughed at it,

i gave you my life and u fucked it

i lost my friends coz of you

i changed the way i dress for you

i changed the way i am for you

i cant even go to the park with my dog anymore coz when i go there the only thing in my mind

is you, and everything you did, and how many times i cried!

you have no idea how many times i cried!

you have no idea how many times i said i was gonna die!

you have no idea how much i want to die!

you have no idea why i love you,

but i do, you're everything to me!

i just wish i was everything to you, i wish you even liked me,

now my best friend is my ipod,

my clothes are black,

my ''friends'' dont talk to me!

i dont sleep!

i dont talk!

i dont have friends!

i dont have a life!

CUZ I GAVE IT TO YOU, AND I FELL FOR YOU!

AND YOU, YOU DIDNT CARE! YOU IGNORED!

YOU TOLD ME TO FUCK OFF!

YOU TOLD ME I WAS ANNOYING!

YOU TOLD ME I WAS A STALKER!

YOU TOLD ME I WAS STUPID!

YOU TOLD ME I SHOULD DIE!

YOU TOLD ME I WAS IMMATURE!

YOU TOLD ME I WAS BULLSHIT!

YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVED SOMEONE ELSE!

YOU TOLD ME YOU WOULD NEVER LIKE ME!

YOU TOLD ME HOW BAD HOW STUPID HOW USELESS HOW ANNOYING HOW IMMATURE HOW UGLY AND EVERYTHING

YOU JUST WANT ME TO DIE!

YOU WANT THE PERSON WHO MOST LOVE YOU IN THE WHOLE WORLD TO DIE!

AND YOU DO, FOR NO REASON BUT YOU DO!

YOU CANT UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING I HAD TO DO FOR YOU

YOU CANT UNDERSTAND HOW SAD IM

AND I BLAME IT ON YOU!

I BLAME IT ON YOU, COZ YOU'RE PERFECT!

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR ALL I EVER WANTED!

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR CUTE

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR FUNNY

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ UR NICE

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ U FORGOT ME

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ ALWAYS WHEN I LISTEN TO BEST I EVER HAD I WANT TO DIE!

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ YOU MADE ME HAPPY AND YOU COULD MAKE ME THE HAPPIEST PERSON EVER!

I BLAME IT ON YOU COZ THE ONLY PERSON I COULD EVER FALL IN LOVE WITH IS YOU!!

YOU! YOU! AND YOU!

UR THE ONLY ONE!

UR THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN MAKE ME HAPPY!

BUT YOU DONT WANT TO!

YOU WANT TO MAKE ME REAL SAD!

I KNOW IT, I KNOW THAT IM NOT THE BEST FOR YOU,

I KNOW THAT YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN ME,

AND I KNOW THAT UR NEVER GONNA LOVE ME.

But the other thing i know is that i will always love you, and you're the

only guy i could ever die for, i could give my life for, i could kill for,

i could cry for, i could do anything for.

Just telling you, how much i need you.

I'm so sorry, im so so so sorry for meeting you and loving you,

umm i hope i get over it, but i know i cant, coz ur everything !

YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME! OK, EVERYTHING. I REALLY MEAN IT!

today i was at my mums friends house, and there was a guy who was smelling really good.. and yea im weird and

talk bout ppls smell lol and like he smelt like u do, it was weird, and in the same moment when that guy came

i was listening to best i ever had, just to fuck it more you know

then, i told my mum i wanted to go home coz i couldnt stay there

coz i couldnt do anything

and i did it coz i couldnt stop thinking of you when that guy was next to me

i dont know what to do anymore, i really dont

i pretty much think the only thing i can do to forget you is die.

and maybe, im gonna die, coz the way i told you i would always love you and i do,

i am telling you i would die for you and i will,

its like the only thing i can do right now! its the only thing that matters to me!

its you!

i love you

i love the way you talk and you know it

i love the way you act and you know it

i love the way you are and you know it

i love your hair and you know it

i love your smell and you know it lol

i loved when you used to texted me each 5 minutes and i used to text you the whole day

i loved when i met you

i loved when i told you i loved you

i loved you when we went to the park that day and i told you to yell penis if you loved me and you did lol

and then after all that, my best friend amy hated me, she hated me coz she knew you were everything to me,

and now im crying, and now im dying, and now im wondering why cant you love me :(

i seriously cant do anything anymore, i just cant, i go to my friends house and i talk about you.

i dont sleep anymore

i dont talk anymore

and when i talk its about you

when i cry its for you

when die its for you

when i think im thinking of you

when i go out with someone i just wish SO MUCH you were that person!

when i tell some guy i love him, i dont.

everyday when i wake up,

i say '' today im gonna stop loving him, today i hate him and today im not gonna try to talk to him! ''

when i say that, im lying to myself,

when i say something bad about you

im lying to myself

when i say i love you its the biggest truth ever,

when i say ur everything to me im not lying, you are.

you are everything i need

you are everything i love

you are everything i always wanted

but i cant have it,

i really changed like REALLY DID

im not funny as i used to be

i dont dress like i used to dress coz i know you dont like it

my hair looks like emo,

my mum said i have to eat, but i dont, and when i do i want to vomit

my friends said i have a problem, its not just a problem its an obssesion!

and its you,

why do i love you?

why are you everything?

why are you so cute?

and why are you so perfect?

and why cant you love me like other people do?

well, i know why i guess..

coz for you im stupid

coz for you im useless

coz for you im bullshit

coz for you im immature

coz for you im nothing

coz for you im not even a good friend

coz for you im ugly

and coz for you, im not enough.

im not even gonna send this to you, coz i know you wont read it, and i know you're never gonna know how much i love you and

like, im trying to stop crying, im trying to stop dying, im trying to eat, im trying to forget you,

im trying to make new friends, im trying to sleep, im trying to be the way i used to be, the problem is that i cant. :(

ok, i think its all i wanted to say.

2010-03-09T10:41:00.004-08:00

i dont know what to write anymore, like omgggg i keep writting about him but i dont want to and i dont

mean to :(

like, its weird how much i love him, sometimes i get crazy,

sometimes i cry and it makes me sad it makes me feel bad you know..

its like, he doesnt care at all, he acts like i dont mean anything and i actually dont mean anything to himmm :(

i think he hates me,

but he doesnt have reasons to!

he doesnt need to make me feel bad just because he is feeling bad.

i cant sleep i cant just live my life again!

i cant have my friends back

and i have no idea how i left my friends just because of a guy!

I CANT BELIEVE HOW MUCH HE MEANS TO ME

I HAVE NO IDEA WHY BUT I KNOW HE MEANS MORE THAN ANYTHING

i know he is not mine but i know he needs to be!

its like that! he needs to be mine and he needs to love me!

thats why we were born, to love eachother........... ):

please YOU love me!

i beg you

i do anything you want

i already did anything to have you but u didnt want me!

whats wrong with me aye

i dont know.. i really dont know whats wrong with me,..

i just know that im annoying for you

im ugly for you

im not enough for you

im stupid for you

im useless for you

im everything as bad as it can be for you!

why cant you see me? why cant you just love me backkkkk, thats all i ever wanted, to see you smilling and

looking at me and saying '' i love you '' and i would know you mean it!

but you cant, you wont, and you dont want to .

you dont love me for some reason

im not ugly, there is millions of people out there uglier than me!

im not annoying, there is lots of people who say im not!

im not perfect, i know im not, no one is perfect but please dont be perfectionist

I LOVE YOU.

PLEASE LOVE ME

please please please!

boy please be mine!

just please give me a hug

just please give me your loveeeeeeeee,

thats all i want,

i want your love and i want it now

i wanna love you i wanna kiss you i wanna hug you i wanna touch you

anything for you

whenever

wherever

however........................

im feeling sad inside now,

its your fault and please talk to me

please dont ignore me,

last week i had a fight with my mum and i went running to the bathroom and i really was gonna cut myself

so my mum just went inside and started yelling at me

it sucks that i know i didnt want to die because of my fights with my mum

i wanted to die because.......... because........ i just.. i dont know

maybe god just said '' you need to love him, but he doesnt love you and you will die for it '' ????

well i dont think god would do that

maybe god said '' you will love him, he wont love you but one day he will notice how important you are and he will

ask everyday himself why he didnt love you when you loved him ''

well.. i would like god to say that aye

but i dont think he did

i dont know ok im confused im sad im afraid and im afraid of love, i notice that love can do anything, it changes ANYTHING

it makes u sad and makes u happy, it makes you shy it makes you cry, it makes you smile and it stays for a while.

i wanna see you, just seeing you would make me happpppppy. :(

i dont know what to do, gosh, please god help me! i dont wanna cry i dont wanna feel sad anymore!

PLEASE MAKE HIM LIKE ME, GOD PLEEEEEEASE MAKE HIM NOTICE THAT IM THE ONE FOR HIM!

MAKE HIM THINK ABOUT ME THE WHOLE NIGHT TODAY

AND MAKE HIM LOVE ME !

MAKE HIM CRAZY ABOUT ME

PLEEEEASE MAKE HIM LOVE ME

I NEED HIM TO BE MINE

OR I CAN EVEN DIE.

i wasnt eating sometime ago, now i cant stop eating.

my mum said im suicidle and i said no im not and she said yes you are and you're depressed and i was like wth?

and she said that im getting depressed and she doesnt know why but she noticed it.

im scared, god, im really sad, because i feel like i wanna die and i dont want to, i dont know, its confusing

sometimes im happy but then i think about him and everything goes sad,

everything gets mad

everything sucks.

i need help, i need help from my friends, my parents, everything

because i know im getting sick im getting sick of my sadness im getting sick of being sick

i dont wanna LOVE!

I REALLY WANT TO STOP LOVING!

LOVING MAKES ME SICK!

IT MAKES ME EAT MUCH

AND SOMETIMES MAKES ME STAY WITHOUT EATING FOR DAYS

I CAN DIE

I CAN CRY

I CAN TRY

AND IT WONT WORK!

listening to sad music and thinking about him i do all the time!

its not normal, its REALLY bad, pleeeeease help me pleaaaaasseeee make him look at me and say '' i think i love her ''

make him fall for me!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

PLEASE

ill do anything for it

ill never yell at anyone !

ill never have fights with my mum

ill be perfect at school

i wont do anything wrong

i wont lie i wont cry

i just want him to be mine

please make my wish be true

please make him mine

its all i want

and if u make him mine ill be the happiest girl ever

ill be like seriously REALLY happy,

you dont know how much i love him its crazy its stupid its weird its DIFFERENT.

its not a crush, its not a summer love, its not love, its like when you can do anything for someone

and its true

i MEAN IT

i really mean it

like, you know when you feel sad for no reason and then you start crying and still think its for no reason

but then your heart beats and says someones name?

then you get like ooooh i think thats why im crying, im crying because of him.

i want to be perfect i think, maybe if im perfect he will like me :(

you and me make everything perfect, pleeeeeeeease BE MINE,

ill die for you

if you want me to.

i can do anything for you

and i mean it

its everything for me

everything for me is you

and you are everything,

i bet i love you more than your mum does haha i love you more than anything :(

its not funny, its not to make anyone laugh reading this, its really serious, its bad really bad its like

when you want to die.

i cant change my love for you, i cant just say '' i dont love him anymore '' because I DO!

and i said i wouldnt like you anymore more than 120000000000000 million times and it didnt work.

i never thought i would love,

i never thought i would know what love meant,

but now i do, and its weird, because its a feeling that can change anything you know,

its like when someone means everything to you,

and that person sometimes loves you but this love is not big its not enough to you,

its sad when you love, to me its like dying, loving is a different way of saying dying,

why am i in tears? i just need you here

i just need your love more than anything,

words cant describe everything i feel and felt for you

its like the BIGGEST LOVE ever.

its! seriously you mean anything to me

if someone asked me what i most loved in the whole world i would say '' my parents of course '' but i actually

would say your name, if i could, if i wasnt embarrassed to say it.

god, what do i do??????

please tell me what to do!

please change his mind

HE LOVES ME

HE WILL LOVE ME TOMORROW

HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT TO FOREVER

HE WILL LOVE ME FROM TONIGHT FOR ALWAYS

2010-03-09T10:41:00.003-08:00

the things i hate about you.

i hate the way you stare.

i hate the way you dont even share.

i hate the way you ''play''

and even more how you dont stay.

i hate your smile

i hate your hair

i hate when i see you and i get no air.

i hate the way you think,

and the way you wink.

the way you think makes me angry, the way you wink makes me nervous.

i hate the way you forget,

and the way i want to hug you and you wont let.

i hate how much you're afraid,

to love in my own way.

i hate how you hate chocolate,

and how sweet you still are.

i hate your hates,

but i still hate your loves.

i hate the way you like same things as me,

i hate the way you dont see it.

i hate how you lie,

and how you're not mine.

i hate the way you made me cry,

and the way you didnt try.

i hate how you make me feel, and even how i like you still.

i hate your drugs

but you are mine.

i hate how you flirt

and how you are such a jerk.

i hate how i hate you,

and even more how i love you.

i hate so much your lies and how raff cries.

i hate that bullshit you made me go through,

i hate the shit my life turned to because of you.

i hate your jokes,

i hate what you chose.

i hate your hugs,

and how i wish to hear your words.

i hate the way you used me,

and i hate the reason i didnt use you.

i hate how you ignore,

and i hate how you're always not sure.

i hate how i annoy you,

and how much you say that.

i hate why you cant be next to me,

and hate how you dont kiss me.

i hate how you love her,

i hate how im better than her.

i hate how you fake,

i hate how you make me feel.

i hate how you always do that,

and i hate that im afraid you always will.

i hate that she loves you,

i hate that i love you more.

i hate that you dont love both.

maybe i hate everything on you,

or maybe im just lying that i hate you.

i hate that i loved you,

i hate that i love you,

and i hate the reason you make me love you,

i hate the reason that you're perfect, i hate that you're not mine.

i hate how i tried,

i hate how i cried.

i hate how much i love you,

and how much i need you.

2010-03-09T10:41:00.001-08:00

eu te amo mais que tudo,

tudo mesmo

eu sei que me faz mal e muito triste mas isso nao muda sabe?

isso nao pode mudar eu acho

isso eh mais que tudo

maior que tudo

impossivel alguem te amar mais do que eu

2010-03-09T10:40:00.004-08:00

love makes you cry, maybe it makes you smile but in the end it makes you cry.

sometimes i want to die because i know i wanna stop to cry but i cant because

i met you, and since that i loved you.

love means death, i bet it does.

i bet love is nothing

i bet its just a word that liars like to use

when you used to say you loved me i used to trust you.

now you say you hate me and i trust you more.

it sucks when you love,

it sucks when that person doesnt love you

and gosh i need you!

and please get it i love you.

You

You make me wanna cry.

You make me wanna die.

Sometimes it's funny but now saying that, it isn't.

It was good when i met you,

It was awesome when you lied that you loved me.

I used to love your lies,

They used to make me happy.

But when I saw the real you,

I cried.

I said I was gonna die!

It seens easy for you to say you dont love me.

But its hard for me to say i dont love you.

It seens easy for me to love you

But it seens hard for you to understand how much i want you next to me.

It was funny when we played your game,

your game of lies,

it was funny when i used to trust you.

It was funnier when you made me cry!

It was more funny when i wanted to die.

You dont know how much i cried

You think you're perfect

and you think that you're the best.

I'm sorry, but you made me see that

You're ugly.

You're not funny.

You're not a good person.

You're mean.

You smell like shit.

You don't know what love means.

You don't even know how to spell.

But Don't Worry baby I'm never gonna tell anyone that you don't have anyfeelings.

I'm never gonna tell anyone how much I cried.

I used to cry every morning, every day, and every night.

Yes, It was Really sad.

It was sad when you left me.

It was sad when you lied to me.

It was sad when you used me.

And it was more sad when I saw everything was happening and I noticed that

I would die for you.

I would take a bullet for you.

I would even try to kill myself for you. I actually tried to.

I would stop eating because of you.

I would loose all my real friends because of you.

I would notice that there is no me without you.

I'm sorry,

I'm sorry for trying to make you stay,

I'm sorry for crying for you.

I'm sorry for being scared of loving someone else because of you.

I'm sorry for being stupid.

I'm really sorry for being ugly.

I'm more sorry for not being funny.

I'm sorry for not being enough to you.

I just wanted you to know that I love you.

Because baby you're actually the best, maybe you're not the best for some people but

you are the best for rafa. And when i grow up and if i see you i will run for you and tell you

that i never forgot you. And never will. Maybe that's not our time, Maybe there is no

time for us. But, baby, you're not mine i guess, i wish you were! i wish you were here

and i cry because of it. bye. im sorry.

2010-03-09T10:40:00.003-08:00

i changed my look to emo

i changed my smile to crying

i changed my friends to nothing

i changed pop to hip-hop

i changed my best friend to computer

i changed my healthy life to not eating

i changed the guy i liked for you

i changed my heart to broken and it worths nothing to you.

im not calling you baby anymore.

im not saying i love you anymore.

im not acting like i like you anymore.

im not changing my mind and my opnion about you till you see that you love me.

im everything you could have and you still dont see it?!

i changed my friends and you still didnt want me.

i changed my clothes and you still didnt want me.

i changed my style and you still didnt want me.

i changed my life and you still didnt want me.

i changed my hair and you still didnt want me.

i changed my songs and you still didnt want me.

i changed my way to dance and you still didnt want me.

i changed my way to be and you still didnt want me.

i changed my way to talk and you still didnt want me.

i changed everything and you still dont want me.

what do i have to do?

i need to have wings?

i need to be the hottest girl in the world?

i need to be a nerd?

i need to be the best in sports?

i need to know how to sing?

i need to be the funniest person ever?

i need to be the most bitchy girl ever?

what do i need to be????

i need to be like.. her?

right?

is that what you want me to be?

you want me to be fat like her?

you want me to have pimples all over my face like her?

you want me to be ugly like her?

you want me to drink like her?

you want me to have sex like her?

you want me to be a slut like her?

you want me..

you do...

but..

im not changing to that bad for you.

2010-03-09T10:40:00.001-08:00

today i died.

i died my feelings.

i died my heart.

i died.

and you killed me.

you destroyed my feelings.

you broke my heart.

you broke me,

you don't know what you did,

it seens easy not to love me,

but it seens hard to understand how much i love you.

2010-03-09T10:39:00.002-08:00

im sorry for being immature

maybe im not but im still not good for you

maybe u think ur too good

or maybe im actually not enough

i dont know wats happening to me

first love?

maybe?

i dont know

i just know that it never ends

and never will

because ur

the

only

one

cant

actually

love.

and

serious

dont

lie

you

i never did!

im sorry if ur not ready to have a relationship?

im sorry if u dont think im ready to have a relationship?

im sorry for loving u

im really sorry for not forgeting u !

2010-03-09T10:39:00.001-08:00

one thing girls need to learn before they die.

BOYS ARE FOR MOMENTS!

... FRIENDS ARE FOR ALWAYS. =) hehehehehehee

its true because like if you notice boys worth NOTHING and

always in the end you will end up crying for them

because they are dickheads okok

lol some of them are not BUT

most are

so BEWARE of the DICKHEADS.

i always meet dickheads seriously,

and i always go out with dickheads as well.

seriously.

boys make me cry,

they make me try,

and then they make me wanna die.

omfgggg at school this year we are like having to make those really

annoying poems

and i need to make one about music like for next week

AND PLEASE HELP ME!

its a thingy called '' I hear the music '' and

we have to do a poem about that thingy and

the BEST ONE gets $400 dollars in cash!

i knowwww its lots of money aye lol and like yeah i really want it.

so please help me :D brb toilet

back

anyway i dont know why but like i really like to make

poems about boys

and i keep using the word ''cry'' a lot haha i think you noticed btw lol

ok im gonna try to make a poem about a guy now ok ok lol dont laugh!

i love the way you stare,

even if you dont care.

i love the way you cut your hair.

i love the way you smile,

and even when i cry i still wish love meant you and i.

i feel sorry for you sometimes,

because you lie to me.

i feel sorry for me lots of times,

because when you lie you make me happy,

even when i wanna die.

but then in the end i end up wanting to cry,

because of you

because of your lies.

woooooooooooooooooooooooo, that was sad really sad im bad really mad

but please dont tell my mum and dad. lol i had to say that!

goshhh that parody of tik tok makes meeee soooo mad really bad

fucking sad

ok sorry ahahahah

mad + sad + bad = raff with no you. lol

i miss your smile.

i miss your arms.

i miss your eyes.

i miss the way you stare.

bubububbububububububu i dont wanna talk about him but it just

comes like omfggg i cant stop thinking of him.

im happy aye... - awkward silence says no.

- i love the way you stare, even if you dont care. (8)))) ' ;/

i mixx yuh, babe please come back to me!!!!!! lol

my love is deep,

its not even a little bit click.

... isnt it really weird when people change and they

get REALLY hot when they get older?

its like omfg you look so hoooot and you used to look shit.

PENIS PENIS PENIS@

WHAAAAT/?////?? AT 21:47PM ON TV A PENIS???

THATS WHY THE LITTLE KIDS ALL KNOW WHAT SEX MEANS ALREADY

BECAUSE

PEOPLE KEEP SHOWING PENISES ON TV AT 21:47, NO LIKE

IM WATCHING THAT SHIT ON TV

2010-03-09T10:38:00.002-08:00

i dont know what to do with my life anymore

i hate my mum.

i hate my dad.

i hate my ''friends''.

i hate everything.

except him.

it sucks when you only have one reason to live,

and that reason wants you to die.

it sucks.

i loved you once,

i love you still.

i always have and i always will.

i think i might die.

because without you i rather cry.

you showed me perfection,

i showed you love.

you didnt want love,

so you took from me the perfection,

but i left with you the my love.

i bet one day the starts will come down,

that day you will see me and notice what you lost.

i think i'm gonna cry,

because i know i wanna die.

you were everything to me,

i was one of the girls to you,

you still are everything to me,

now i am the worse person in the world for you.

i liked when you said you loved me,

i didnt like when i found out it wasnt true.

one of the differences between boys and girls is,

that girls have feelings, boys have lies.

i wanted you to show me your love.

i gave you my heart!

NOW GIVE IT BACK DICKHEAD!?

2010-03-09T10:38:00.001-08:00

I HATE YOUR HAIR

I HATE YOUR EYES

I HATE YOUR MOUTH

I HATE YOUR FACE.

I HATE THE WAY YOU DRESS.

I HATE THE WAY YOU WERE TO ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU LIE TO ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU PLAYED WITH ME.

I HATE THE WAY YOU ACT.

I HATE THE WAY YOU ARE!

.. and i hate loving you even if i know

that i hate the way you are and the way you act i still love you.

2010-03-09T10:36:00.000-08:00

antes de querer parar de amar alguem, pergunte ao seu coracao se ele esta preparado para parar de amar esta pessoa, porque nessas horas o importante nao e o cerebro e sim o coracao.

2010-02-26T06:36:00.000-08:00

do you think the world is gonna end in 2012?

how old are you?

what is your name?

do you love someone?

what does love mean?

where do you live?

do you like that blog?

what is your favourite tipe of music?

answers in comments.

2010-02-23T08:18:00.000-08:00

i just need you here.

2010-02-23T08:11:00.002-08:00

and you broke her heart again and you didnt even care, you didnt even notice, maybe you didnt even mean to but you did, you killed her again, maybe she has 9 lives like cats because you have had more than one heart given from her

2010-02-23T08:11:00.001-08:00

http://www.glogster.com/media/1/3/46/25/3462533.jpg

bubu

2010-02-23T08:08:00.000-08:00

i think i need your hug more than anything.

2010-02-23T08:05:00.000-08:00

omg, today i woke up really sick and like i didnt go to school yay well its bad because i was sick and good because i didnt go to school and like i have been saying to my mum '' PLEEEEASEEEE CAN I STAY HOME AND DONT GO TO SCHOOL? '' since the second day of school haha and like yeah, and i think tomorrow im gonna fake that im sick because i really dont wanna go to school LOL haha. anyway.. today i kept the whole day listening to '' i can make your bed rock - young money feat lil' wayne '' so listen to it as well and love it as well lol xo

2010-02-23T08:04:00.001-08:00

eu percebi que eu ja estou precisando de ajuda, serio, eu ja passei da fase '' gostar '' ja passei da fase '' acho que amo '' e ja passei da fase '' amor '' agora virou a fase '' eu preciso de ti ou eu morro.

2010-02-23T08:01:00.000-08:00

I NEED TO SEE YOU BOO!

I NEED TO TOUCH YOU BOO!

I NEED TO FEEL YOU BOO!

I NEED TO SMELL YOU BOO!

I NEED TO HUG YOU BOO!

I NEED TO KISS YOU BOO!

I NEED TO STOP LOVING YOU BOO BECAUSE LOVING YOU SUCKS AND LOVING YOU MAKES ME CRAZY, IT MAKES ME HURT MYSELF! IT MAKES ME EAT CHOCOLATE IT MAKES ME RUN THE WORLD IT MAKES ME WANNA CRY AND EVEN WANT TO DIE! IT MAKES ME SCARED IT MAKES ME INSECURE AND REALLY IMMATURE! I CANT UNDERSTAND WHY IT HAPPENS TO ME BUT .. IT'S JUST CRAZY, IT'S NOT NORMAL ANYMORE.. WELL IT NEVER WAS NORMAL! I KNOW YOU MEAN EVERYTHING EVEN IF I MEAN NOTHING TO YOU.

2010-02-23T07:59:00.000-08:00

eu daria tudo para ter mais um dia contigo.

2010-02-22T23:01:00.000-08:00

ADD : http://www.orkut.com/Main#Profile.aspx?origin=is&uid=14224075869546761063

MAIS:

2010-02-22T23:00:00.000-08:00

fotos fake:

2010-02-22T22:58:00.000-08:00

FOTOS PRA FAKE:

2010-02-21T08:52:00.003-08:00

i guess the only way to be happy is with you and if there is no way there is no happiness

2010-02-21T08:31:00.000-08:00

this love is unbreakable, it is untoucheable, its different, its bigger, its more than anything, it breaks my heart it gives me tears it makes me sad and it makes me love you more because its unbreakable.

2010-02-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

agora o que eu posso fazer eh chorar porque eu nao posso mais reclamar eu nao posso nem mais tentar, eu cansei de me desprezar, eu cansei de me fazer de coitadinha e tambem cansei de me fingir de feliz quando eu estou triste, eu vou comecar a mostrar mais meus sentimentos porque eu sei que ninguem nunca vai me entender se eu ficar gritando e pulando quando na verdade eu quero estar chorando.

2010-02-21T08:20:00.003-08:00

i know im nothing without you and without your love and without your hug.

2010-02-21T08:20:00.001-08:00

baby i was wrong for saying good bye.

2010-02-21T08:18:00.000-08:00

how can you take all you said before?

why do i like you?

why cant i just forget you?

why cant i just leave you and act like i dont know you?

how can you do what you did?

how can you forget me like im shit?

because i love you

and because forever you know

and because you got a piece of me

and i dont want it back

because i know that i chose you to give it to.

2010-02-21T08:11:00.000-08:00

eu gosto do seu cheiro

eu gosto do seu amor

eu gosto do seu abraco e tambem do seu calor.

eu gosto dos seus amigos

eu gosto do que tu faz.

eu nao me importo se eh bom ou se eh ruim, mas eu sei que eh por ti.

eu sei que eu perdi minhas amigas

eu tambem sei que perdi voce

mas foi tudo culpa dela,

foi culpa dela que voce me deixou.

foi por culpa dela que eu perdi minhas amigas.

foi por culpa dela que eu quis morrer,

talvez eu possa te culpar tambem

porque foi voce o que fez eu amar.

e isso me faz chorar.

2010-02-21T08:08:00.000-08:00

hey baby can i tell you something? you're a piece of me.

you got my heart like at all

you got me broken

you got my heart broken.

you broke my heart and you broke my feelings.

maybe you didnt mean to

or maybe you didnt care of

maybe you wanted to make me feel like shit

to make you feel like the best

well, you're not the best

.. maybe you're actually the best. but you're the best of the dickheads.

you're the one who has no feelings

you're the one who likes to break hearts.

you're the one who can make a girl the happiest ever

but you dont want to, you want to make her sad.

and you're the one who can make someone want to die.

you're the one who likes to make girls cry

you're the one who will pay for all you did one day.

and you're the one who makes me love you. :(

2010-02-18T02:27:00.001-08:00

loving you makes me sad, makes me feel bad, makes me feel insecure and also makes me feel immature.

2010-02-18T02:22:00.000-08:00

ps: gente, esse blog eh tipo um diario ok tipo eu boto coisas que eu quero lembrar rs e escrevo merdas tbm bjs euri mas eu nao boto nomes porque sei la neh imagina se alguem me conhece e ri da minha cara de tanta bobagem q eu escrevo rialto

2010-02-18T02:13:00.000-08:00

eu nao sei porque eu nao sei quando eu nao sei como eu nao sei quem, eu so sei que por alguma razao eu mudei, talvez por ti, talvez por minha felicidade que eu nunca encontrei, eu queria voltar no tempo, ter feito o que eu nao fiz e nao ter feito o que eu fiz, eu queria nao ter mudado, eu queria nao ter deixado, eu queria que tudo voltasse ao normal, eu sei que tudo passou, tudo mudou e nada vai voltar ao mesmo de antes, isso me deixa triste, insegura e tambem me deixa imatura. eu ja percebi que nem contando as estrelas vai passar das vezes que eu chorei por voce, eu sei que lagrimas minhas por voce podem ate chover, eu sei que a felicidade eu tenho no lado de voce, eu sei que amor eu nunca posso ter.

outro:

i hate the way you stare at me, i hate the way you dress, i hate the way you look. i hate your smile, i hate your hair and even your eyes. i hate more and more your lies, i hate the way you talk, i hate the way you walk. i hate the way you changed me and i hate the way you killed me inside, i hate you so much sometimes it makes me rhyme, i hate the fact that i lost my friends because of you, i hate the fact that you didnt worth it, i hate the fact that you didnt look at me and i hate the fact that you didnt call me back. i hate the fact that you're not perfect but what i like is imperfection and it makes me love you.

2010-02-17T03:58:00.001-08:00

ummm i dont know what happened with me, i think i died.

2010-02-17T03:54:00.000-08:00

you dont bother

you dont talk

you dont see me

i know exactly what is going on

you forgot

you forgot what happened

you forgot me

you cant see me

i wish you could see me

i wish you didnt forget everything

i didnt know you would forget me so fast

maybe it wasnt fast but maybe it was truly.

2010-02-17T03:52:00.000-08:00

i have been so afraid of loving again

i have been so scared of trying

i have been crying

i dont know wat is happening

i'm going crazy

i have to skip what's happening

because i always knew you were the one for me and

now what do i do?

i can barely move

and ooooooh

i cant even survive

im going crazy

oh and iiiii am feeling stupid

because i always knew you were the one for me!

and because i always knew i loved you.

2010-02-13T22:47:00.000-08:00

Museu usa miniveículos para mostrar evolução dos carrosO Museu da Miniatura Automóvel, na cidade de Gouveia, no norte de Portugal, mostra a evolução dos carros desde o início do século 20 por meio de veículos de brinquedo.Táxis, carros de bombeiros e até os usados por personagens como Tim Tim ou por autoridades como o presidente americano John Kennedy fazem parte da exposição. Entre os mais de quatro mil veículos também está o papamóvel usado por João Paulo 2º, além dos carros de Fórmula 1. O museu está atraindo tantos turistas para a cidade de Gouveia que os responsáveis querem mudar a exposição para um prédio maior, com capacidade para dez mil miniveículos.

2010-02-13T22:46:00.001-08:00

EUROPA

Gata 'adota' Auschwitz

Player

A sobriedade do antigo campo de concentração de Auschwitz, que hoje abriga um museu, está sendo quebrada por uma presença inusitada: uma gata batizada de "Bruno", que adotou o local como casa há algumas semanas.

Mesmo enfrentando o rigoroso inverno polonês, Bruno prefere ficar em uma cabana na entrada do campo do que ser levada dali.

Funcionários do museu já tentaram abrigá-la em suas casas, mas ela voltou para local, onde virou atração entre os turistas.

Jornais poloneses noticiaram que as autoridades pretendem colocar Bruno em um abrigo público, mas uma página no site de relacionamentos Facebook pede para que a gata continue no antigo campo de concentração.